Micah--chapter 6

So today my internet was shot. I waited three hours to get to post this. That's why the formatting is funky. I had to do it all in word.

Without further ado...

Anita and Micah ordered room service. However, before Micah opens the door, he takes a couple seconds to check out the dude and grab his scent, on the off-chance somebody with a gun might be hiding in the room service cart.

Anita realizes that she unsnapped her gun and had it ready to draw only after Micah opens the door.

I actually love every part of this. This shows—without telling us—that Anita’s life is insane and dangerous. She’s on a romantic vacation with her boyfriend and they both go paranoid freakout over room service that they themselves ordered. This does everything the last several chapters failed to do. It establishes them as tough, as people who need to be tough, and as people who are wound so tight they’re about to snap. This is how you do character development. 

This is also why this series is so fucking infuriating. WHY DID WE HAVE TO READ THROUGH PAGES OF SUCK TO GET ONE GOOD PIECE OF CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT? 

Fuck it. 

Micah ordered a salad and chicken breast. Anita says she’d better not be getting the salad and he confirms that the chicken is hers, the salad is his, and he would have ordered heavier but they’re about to have marathon sex and the steaks Anita wanted would have made them both upchuck.

I am so glad we needed to know all of this.

"I blushed, because the memory of just how much we’d been drawn together from the moment we’d met always made me a little embarrassed. All right, more than a little."

That’s the time that he RAPED YOU in the shower, right Anita? You know, I’d even buy this relationship (a little bit. VERY little.) if this were ever acknowledged and delt with. But the fact that it was clearly rape and this is clearly ignored makes every single thing that Micah does very very squicky.

"He looked at me for a moment, then gave a small nod. But his face was back to being careful. His neutral, pleasant I’m managing her moods face. I hated that face because it meant I was being difficult, but I didn’t know how to stop being difficult. I was tripping over issues I’d thought I’d worked out months ago. What the hell was the matter with me?"

You’re being written by LKH?

I’m going to make a confession here, folks. There are relatively few paranormal romance writers I actually like. I enjoy Patricia Briggs (mostly. I still hate Frost Burned on the re-read) and P.N. Elrod. I’ve never read Butcher and I don’t intend to (it’s completely irrational; I’ve got nothing against the author, and I’m sure he’s really good, but I’ve never been in a mood to crack his pages. I had the same thing against watching Avatar, which I finally did watch and now actively hate. HOW DO YOU MAKE BODY HOPPING ALIENS DULL? Apparently let James Cameron direct it). Kim Harrison is good, but I kind of lost interest halfway through the second book and I have no idea why. Charlene Harris is probably the nicest human being you’ll ever meet, but Sookie Stackhouse needs to go die in a fire. The reason that I keep on going back to LKH over and over and over again is I actively liked her books and I’ve yet to find a replacement that holds my interest the way she did. (Though Briggs and Elrod come kind of close). 

But for all those other writers, nobody decayed the way LKH did. We went from having an active protagonist who resolves plots decisively to one that constantly retreds the same old tired ground. We resolved this, Anita. EVEN YOU ARE POINTING OUT THAT  WE HAVE RESOLVED THIS. WHY ARE WE NOT MOVING ON?

“I have no idea why you are this”— he made a waffling motion with his hand—“ but we’ll play it your way.

I’d say “Fuck you too, Micah” but I think I ought to have concerns about his schlong.

So they decide to discuss each other’s scars because that is what’s at issue here, and Anita just rehashes stuff that’s been covered in the introductions of every single book of this series. The cross shaped scar. The nastiness on her neck. The bites on her collarbone. 

Micah tells his story: He was out hunting and got mauled by a were-leopard. LKH uses this story to maul every. Single. Little. Detail she possibly can, and Anita starts apologizing for not liking the room because it made Micah’s PTSD worse. 

You know, most authors would find giving their protagonist’s central relationship unintentional overtones of abuse to be a bad thing. (Intentional, it’s another story.)

And then we find out that he lost his first love because his penis is too large.

I thought about having all that shoved inside for the first time, maybe without enough foreplay.

THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED. YOU ALSO DID NOT GIVE CONSENT.

Oh, hey, let’s address the other rape in this series:

He laughed. “I didn’t ask Richard. I asked around and found out he thought you were too bloodthirsty, and he didn’t like the police work. None of that bothered me.”\

ANITA RAPED RICHARD AND THAT IS WHY HE BROKE IT OFF. THAT IS NOT ME. THAT IS THE FUCKING TEXT. JESUS. EFFING. CHRIST.

And on that note, they run off to bed. End of chapter.