I am re-reading this book. And with the pressure on to make it ABSOLTELY PERFECT I want to kick myself for not doing a better job on the first draft.
The thing about writing is, the first draft is not a thing. It is the moment when you are flinging shit at the wall and waiting to see what sticks. So far, not a lot is sticking. I hated writing it, I will probably hate editing it, until about Dec 15th when it's come together a little more and I start being amazed at how...not from me most of my writing is. The best moments are usually in the second or third draft when most of the bullshit has been cleared away and I find out a whole bunch of disconnected things kind of connected themselves when I wasn't looking, and if I just tweek a couple passages the rest of it will all link up and make me look really, really good. I know that moment will come. It came with every other book so far. I just don't like not having that feeling now, when I know there are at least two people actively waiting on this.
I will, I think, be keeping the flashback/flashforward thing from the earlier books. Partially because it will help my ultimate goal with this series along emencely. (If you do not simultaneously love the book and hate me at the end of it, I have not done my job right) partially because it says part of what I think Sci-fi should say. Fantasy is about who we are right now. Sci-fi is about where we're going. Weird thing is, we're also defined by our past in a really weird way. And I like being able to lay past and present side-by-side like this and say, this is what made these people the way they are.
The other thing that worries me is...this story will have a positive ending, but I can't comfortably say this is a Happily Ever After yet. Oh, that's coming. I LOVE HEA as much as the next girl. I just believe in making characters earn them. But I've got this story arc planned down to the minute, and if it were a real novel, this ending would technically be the midpoint. You're going to hate me. The next one is going to end at the "failure" point, which means (If you're still with me that late into the career) that you are REALLY going to hate me.
Which I am fine with, as long as you like the story. If I am not fucking with you, boys and girls, I am not doing my job as a writer.
Ah, well. Must sign off and go do real job now. Which sucks. I've got a migrane that is KILLING me. Have a nice weekend!