Sunday, January 26, 2014

The Harlequin--chapter 29

I HADN’T RECOGNIZED Peter at first, because he’d done that growth spurt thing that teenage boys do sometimes.
It's an extremely nit-picky thing to bitch at, given that we're pretty much just discussing rape at this point (Because once again, that is ALL this book is about) but if Anita is supposed to be this GREAT cop with this GREAT  skillset, being confused by a growth spurt is kind of...IDK...NOT SMART.

Also: Apparently only some teenaged boys have growth spurts. The rest of 'em stay marooned at a thirteen year old's four foot three. Nice to know.

Anita scans Peter for signs that he's a predator in the making, because apparently RAPING TWO OF HIS GIRLFRIENDS isn't a big enough clue. (I like how FUCKING RAPE is LKH's go-to for "possible trouble in adolescence". Seriously, I'd love to have a look at the woman's mental rolodex. Does it have ANYTHING other than "Rape" in it?) She also spends a paragraph complaining that Peter's fake ID is too good and that Edward is advancing his education too much.

I do not remember Edward having such shitty boundaries. That was one of the things I liked about his character. Ted Forrester and Edward weren't the same people, and he kept that very clear. LKH has apparently decided that THAT line needs to be good and blurred.

Olaf looks like the dad from The Munsters. He does. Also, Anita will go out of her way to avoid telling her body guards that Olaf is a serial killer whose victims are exactly Anita's type. She'll finally dump that job off on Edward and mysteriously, none of her bodyguards will immediately kill the son of a bitch. Here's hoping for a stray bullet or nine.

Anita does, however, assure her bodyguards that Olaf has promised to behave in St. Louis. Because serial killers have a history of keeping their promises to potential victims.

Again: You have vampires who are very powerful who do not give a FUCK about the law. Roll Olaf and MAKE him behave himself.

Anita reveals that she has somehow discerned that the female vamps she saw via rape-o-vision are plants in the Church of Eternal Life, and that they are the vamps she's got warrents to kill. Olaf asks her what they look like. He gets very excited. Anita shows a lot of reluctance to have him along, but she does not kill him, which means she doesn't actually give a fuck about morality, she just finds this shit distasteful. But she does tell him they're sure fits.

I forced myself to look up and meet Olaf’s gaze. I fought to watch his face while I said, “They fit your vic profile, if that’s what you want to know. One of them maybe a little tall, but the other one is juuust right.”

Anita is promising a serial killer victims in return for his cooperation. Her justification is that she'll have to decapitate these girls and she doesn't know anybody else who'd go along with it.

Anita. Richard ATE people because that was the thing to do after a dominance fight. Most of these vampires do not give a fuck about killing things. They just do. You could bring them along and they'd have no problem cleaning up. This is not enough justification for using a serial killer as backup.

And then...this happens.

“Where is the paperwork?” he asked. “In my briefcase in Jean-Claude’s place.” “You can’t go to the Circus of the Damned without me, Anita.”

I actually re-read the entire book up to this point this afternoon because I was sure that we were already at the circus. The descriptions matched the descriptions of the Circus rooms, there's a breakfast thingy here, Sampson was here, and I was pretty sure that Guilty Pleasures connected to the Circus via tunnels. But apparently no, it doesn't and no, we're still at GP and Jean Claude, who is so paranoid his back door didn't even have a key until recently, is sleeping at his nightclub and not in his main lair while the murderous crazy vamps are hunting him.

These people have no logic.

Anita spends a paragraph talking about how Peter's boots are real cowboy boots and Olaf's aren't. Folks, I'm a Texan. Unless you own a motherfucking ranch, and by "own" I mean ACTIVELY WORK, you have no reason to own a pair of cowboy boots. Or the fucking hat, either (I hate the hat. Have I mentioned yet, how much I hate the goddamned hat? I remember a crime show where the florida cops and people were "Generic thrift store" and the georgia cops and people were "generic thrift store" and the Texas cops and people were all in cowboy hats, boots and fucking string ties. NO.)

Olaf disrespects Claudia. Anita rips him a new one.

I kind of like that part.

Also, it's amusing to watch LKH actually try to write a misogynistic character. It's kind of cute.

Anita finally decides that it's not worth it and heads off to Richard's room with Peter.

end of chapter.


  1. where I live cowboy boots are a fashion statement.

  2. This book is like watching a train crash into a car - you don't want to look, but you can't look away.

    You get all of the respect for going through this horrible shit for our entertainment.

  3. After this crap is over, I recommend you review the Young Wizards series by Diane Duane. It's got respect for boundaries all over the place.