Monday, December 23, 2013

Danse Macabre chapter 54-55

Chapter fifty four opens with Anita and Asher backtracking on every single thing they said in the previous chapter.

I swear to God. I've heard people talk about books being unreadable and I've always been kinda like "HUH?" I mean, Eye of Argon, that's unreadable. I could muscle my way through all of Fifty Shades, which sadly now looks like Hunger Games plot wise. Twilight. Everybody called them "unreadable" and I was like "Well, it's bad, but you read the damn thing."

This book. This book is unreadable. Rape aside, not one thing has advanced, not one character has developed one iota. The only crisis that resolved itself is one that never existed in the first place and I swear to fucking god if there is one more sex scene after this one I'm going to go insane.

Wet and tight rears its ugly head. Given that she hasn't had a shower since the limo, apparently Asher doesn't really mind seconds. Asher demands to do Anita doggy-style. They do. And...

chapter fifty-five

Anita wakes up in the hospital. The therianthrope hospital. Dr. Lillian gave Anita a transfusion and risked giving her yet another strain of lycanthropy. Yippee.

Asher is, of course, at her bedside wringing his hands and looking worried. And now once again he's all ANGST and YOU DON'T REALLY LOVE ME and Anita gets to ANGST to his ANGST and this got old about four books ago.

He also reveals that he's got a Heyena as his Animal to Call. Cool.

Anita summarizes everything that happened in this book. Unlike the usual hand-wave of loose plot threads, this...basically just retreds the entire book. It ends with this.

I’m happy behind my black wrought-iron fence. The one with the pointy spikes on top. White never really was my color.

Wow. Aren't you edgy.

And that is the end of the book.

Alright, guys. I am open to suggestions for whatever happens next. I'm also going to go curl back up in bed with cold medicine. I am ALMOST over this shit, but now we're down to the annoying bits.

1 comment:

  1. Best of luck getting better! I have no suggestions of what to do next....I'm not sure I could even bear to read another AB book through you, but if you want to endure another one I vote The Harlequin, since that's another I haven't read. If not that, the first Gillian Keys book, I've never seen a complete spork of it. Wouldn't say no to other famously-bad fantasy novels like Eragon either, though I find I have a hard time following for some reason if it's not something of a series I've read (like I just couldn't keep with that dinosaur one)