Friday, October 19, 2012

The Dip

Okay. If you've read this blog for a while, you'll know I have *issues*. And I don't mean gee, sometimes I get a little sad. I'll be the first to admit I am probably crazy on a level that few people want to deal with.

Which sometimes gets in the way of creativity.

First, you have the Rejection Roundhouse, which is the biggest reason I decided to stop trying for professional publication (Sorry, but if the only outcome of an effort is, I spend days sunk in a suicidal depression, that effort is probably not good for me.) This also effects IRL things. But the biggest problem I have is The Dip.

The Dip is what I call the thing that happens when a project is finished.It takes a lot of focused energy to work on things. This creates a really awesome high. I feel good with the world. Everybody loves me. I will conquer all. I finish the project, wrap it up, hit submit/publish/whatever and spend about one day basking in the glory that is my completed work.

And then my brain, exhausted from days of pumping out happy chemicals, mutters "thank GOD that's over" and sinks like the Titanic was carrying an atomic bomb when the iceberg hit. And floundering through the mess left afterwards? It SUCKS.

Worst part is, it's not something that can just be, like, fixed. It's natural brain chemistry, I think. Only thing that can fix it is throwing myself whole hog into a brand new project.

Ah, well. That's the ramble for today. You'll get another chapter of Captive soon. Ish. I just don't want to deal with the stupid today.


  1. I know exactly how this feels. And you named it perfectly.

  2. First time I noticed it was with artwork. I got into this crazy death spiral of productivity that ended in a crapload of pretty pictures and also my first bout with bronchitis. (the actual illness was probably not related, but the stress definitely did not help my immune system.)

    Identifying the enemy is half the battle. Unfortunately, it's that OTHER half I have trouble with.