Tuesday, February 3, 2015

Stroke of Midnight--chapter 22

Merry complains about how the CS techs are complaining. Apparently electronic shit doesn't work down in the fairy mounds and Merry forgot to tell them this.

Merry, you INVITED the crime scene techs specifically for their tech. WHY WOULD YOU FORGET THAT THE TECH DOESN'T WORK.

Police do not like to be fucked with, especially if they've just, maybe, pissed off all the local feds on your behalf.
It never ceases to amaze me  how LKH manages to condemn her own main character's behavior in the text without noticing. It's kind of like accidentally solving impossible equations. Merry is ABSOLUTELY fucking with the cops right now, she has been since the minute she invited them down, and now she's acting like their concern--remember, she was screaming because somebody tried to kill Galen--is inconvenient.

Because of course the cops are supposed to ignore assassination attempts. Isn't that how cops work? (No. No it's not.)

Then Merry has a pang of guilt for brainwashing one of the female guards into falling in love with the male guards. Somehow this ended with her losing her eyes, which I really don't remember from the last chapter. Merry says her eyes will grow back, which means her bad behavior has no real consequences whatsoever.

The lead investigator grabs Merry and notices that beneath her glamour, she's covered in blood. He starts to grill her on what happened. She's dismissive because assassination attempts aren't a big deal. The cop advises her to get the fuck out of St. Louis because someone is trying to kill her. Then the cop asks her, flat out, if the evidence they gather will be used to justify murdering the perp and heavily implies that the nature of the evidence delivered depends on Merry's answer.

I now totally heart Captain Walters. He's calling Merry on her shit. He deserves all the things.

Merry asks if he knows if they've got something. He doesn't say yes, but yeah, they found something and they want to be VERY careful before they turn it over to Merry. Because, you know, somebody's going to die because of their info. Merry pushes, saying that her assassin might be the murderer. Given that this is the lair of bloody psychopaths, I think that's a big leap. The murderer could just be a hobbiest who doesn't give a fuck. Walters refuses to budge. If somebody's gonna die because of what they found, they're going to make absolutely sure before they turn it over.

We've spent fuck knows how many chapters on sex, and we had this plot the entire time. A damn good, honorable cop trying to find a murderer while simultaneously trying to protect both the perp AND any random innocents from the psycopathic alien monsters who invited them in.


Merry says "I can use magic and make you tell."

Walters says if she does, she'll never get any help from any cop ever again. 

I now want to marry this fictional character. This is the first LKH character that has a spine and reasonable boundaries. I'm terrified about how she's going to fuck it up, but...yeah, I want this character to get lead in his own book. DAMN.

Walters then tells the guard that what they found is a print from one of Merry's crew, so they need to be extra careful with her, and he's not saying anything else because he's not getting an innocent dude killed. He heads off to go take care of his people.

Merry then has a panic attack. Why she has a panic attack, I have no clue, but she does and she snuggles with everybody because...snuggling with a potential murderer is perfectly fine and dandy.

Seriously. She just found out one of these guys probably just killed someone and she's making out with 'em because Fuck This Book, that's why.

The tech that found the print goes over to talk to Merry, because this is smart and not-at-all risky. Merry repeats what she told Walters: they're gonna kill this idiot soon as they find him. She also explains that this torture-murder justice system is justified because it is, and I quote, "a cultural thing".

Then Merry asks if somebody could fake a print.

According to Mythbusters, the answer is "yes". Merry decides that the fae couldn't, though, because none of them watch enough CSI to understand how fingerprints work.

Seriously. They can't fake evidence because they don't watch enough TV.

The tech tries to demo how she found the print on one of the guards because somehow now the potential murderer is kitchen staff. The guard bewitches the tech because that totally accomplishes something. They send the tech to a different guard and she explains that she found a bloody handprint, as if they were trying to pull a knife out of the dead bodies. Then she starts to push on the connection between Merry and the MOST BEAUTIFUL MAN IN THE WORLD. Somehow this turns into a scuffle and Merry falls into skin to skin contact with the MBMITW. The chapter ends with the heavy implication that, once again, we're trading a good plot for sex.

And Captain Walters is now my hero.


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